The Sinner, My Mirror-Image

"...[T]here is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free person, there is not male and female..." ~Galatians 3:28

"...[T]he Mass commences with a gathering of people...from all walks of life, from different social and educational backgrounds, from a variety of economic strata, with differing levels of moral excellence...gathered around the altar of Christ." ~ Robert Barron, Catholicism


I don't know about you, but my world is draped in a tapestry of diversity, whether at work, at the store, commuting, visiting, and so forth. Thank goodness everyone isn't exactly like me--they'd drive me nuts! I have annoying habits, moods, and sometimes I haven't been as patient or kind to my loved ones, or strangers, as I ought to have been. I might be inclined to seek justification in the words or actions of others, but a visit to my mirror is all I truly need to be reminded who the culprit has been. You see, I'm a sinner. And, Jesus loves me anyway.

Wow! Stop and think about that for an additional moment...

I'm a sinner. When faced with choices in life, I sometimes choose words, thoughts, actions or ommissions that contravene what God would have preferred me to undertake. Apparently I'm not alone. The accomplished person we might admire...a sinner. The poor individual we might pity...a sinner. The role model educator or coach...a sinner. Our favorite saints...sinners, too. Such good company does not, of course, excuse my own sinfulness. Fortunately, I have Lent.

God has loved you and I from before we were even formed. He is taking no pleasure in our sinfulness, but he is also not seeking harsh punishment for us. But, until I can name my sin, admit my sin, recognize the grave impact that my sin has upon my relationship with God, as well as my relationship with those upon whom my sin affects, I am broken.

I am NOT forsaken. But, I am responsible to repent.

Our Lord is not going to analyze our worldly measurements before washing away our sins. He is not going to differentiate between earthly strata or human-made honors when dispensing His forgiveness. God loved me just as much when I was a young ditch-digger and restaurant dishwasher, as he will when I am a retired grandfather.

Do I exercise that same level of non-judgmental, status-blind love and forgiveness in my daily walk?

While we undoubtedly each love the Lord with all our hearts and souls, are we fully living out our baptismal promise as we engage the world each day, sharing the Eucharist with all whom we encounter?

...Do we sincerely thank our husbands or wives for the necessary tasks they perform each day for our family's benefit?

...Do we genuinely listen to our children as they recount their highlights and challenges of the school day?

...Do we greet the custodian or security guard at work with the same caring smile and enthusiasm that we greet our boss?

...Do we offer non-judgmental and active listening to a co-worker or neighbor who expresses personal challenges?

...Do we say "yes" to volunteer when it would have been easier and more self-convenient to have said "no" instead?

...Add your own...

Sadly, I fail. No, I don't fail each and every time. But I fail often enough that I know I could do better to build God's Kingdom by embracing these daily moments to be Christ to that person whom I encounter. I'm...a sinner.

Thankfully, it's Lent! And I have the opportunity EVERY DAY to better live out our Faith. I believe that folks really don't care how pious we appear, but they do observe how genuinely we actively represent our Faith. It's the little things that count.

They will know that we have something that they are lacking. Be yourself.

They will ask how they can get what we have. Be yourself.

They will know that we don't have all the answers. Be yourself.

Yourself. Myself. That's how God created us and how He loves us.

I looked in the mirror today...and I saw a sinner...and that sinner is me.

The Enemy of the Good

"The value of life lies not in the length of days, but in the use we make of them...Whether you find satisfaction in life depends not on your tale of years, but on your will." -Michel de Montaigne

"One of the most important discoveries I have ever made is this truth: God is most glorified in me when I am most satisfied in him. This is the motor that drives my ministry as a pastor. It affects everything I do." - John Piper


My perspective is not unique to the broader populace to be certain, but I am none the less daily refreshed by the many blessings that fill my life. From my passionate commitment to my beautiful Bride to my jovial fatherhood for our seven year old daughter, my daily existence is enveloped in a brightly-colored garment of peace.

As we have entered into this Lenten season, I am again reminded that my imperfections, my sinful nature require cleansing and improvement. I love this time of the year! Recognizing my broader audience, if you are not currently walking the Lenten journey yourself due to your own beliefs of spiritual conscience, I welcome you to this time (or your own time) of self-reflection, spiritual cleansing, and renewal.

I am imperfect. At this point in my life, I am so very aware and so very comfortable admitting my very humanity. Casting an eye back toward youth, so much time, energy and resources are devoted to creating an image of perfection for fear of exposing oneself to one's peers in an unflattering light. Guided by the media, by our peers, and by the self-conscious examples modeled daily in the adults whom we encountered, in our youth we were led to seek a worldly image of perfection.

Competitively, for many of us, we carried this quest for public perfection into our young adulthood through our ever-increasing educational and professional stature. The systems of rewards we encountered fed directly into this driven impulse. We rose individually and we rose collectively. Recognition...honors...money...power...

Where was God during this phase of our journey upward? Where was our concern for those less fortunate around us? For those of us who never took our eye off of our Lord, then the externalities may not have drawn us off course so sharply or even at all. Admittedly, for the weak and sinful like me, the journey was not so much a journey upward as it was a journey downward into a place darkened, cold and devoid of true companionship. All that striving, all that competing had NOT led to perfection.

I was fortunate several years ago to have been touched at a very particular moment with the realization that my own quest for my image of perfection had been the very enemy of the good. The Hand of Perfection reached into my life and I welcomed Him as He led me deeply into my Catholic faith. I was ready to admit that my concept of worldly perfection was true imperfection. Over the years that have followed, I have instead increasingly embraced the daily good that infuses my existence, working steadily to eradicate my own sinfulness by getting outside myself and focusing upon God through my prayers, thoughts, words and actions. I am still so very imperfect...I have a long way to go on this journey.

I am not implying that we settle for mediocre or "just good enough," but I am inviting you to embrace the daily goodness that surrounds you. I find it when I look into my Bride's eyes while I'm listening to her describe her day's events. I find it when I accept my daughter's invitation to play a game together. I find it when I perform a simple task well. I find it when I give of myself to others in some small way. You yourself have many of your own examples, and I hope I hear more of them from you.

Our Lenten journey, our admission of our own sinfulness, our commitment to work with God to eradicate the stumbling blocks that mark our own imperfection will lead us to His Perfection one day. Along the journey, let us not strive for and cling to the false worldly images of perfection, but instead deeply experience the true daily experiences of the Good with which we have been blessed. I invite you to embrace your Good while you walk with God toward his Kingdom.

REVERSIBLE COMMUNICATION FAILURE

"While the rest of the world has been improving technology, Ghana has been improving the quality of man's humanity to man." ~Maya Angelou

"It's not a faith in technology. It's faith in people." ~Steve Jobs



I certainly embrace the efficiencies we have gained to communicate and transact globally using the bounty of technology that has emerged over the past two decades. But even Steve Jobs knew that technology was the tool to aid humanity, not to replace humanity.


Unfortunately, I attribute the degradation of communication style to a collective over-reliance upon technology tools that allow for the decrease in face-to-face communication. It is not mandatory that we decrease our face-to-face communication, but if we allow ourselves to hide behind our smart phones as we walk down the sidewalk, we may come to believe that we are being productive.


But, as with any muscle that we fail to use to its capacity, gradual entropy of communication style, the ability to interpret body language, grace, tone, etc.result direct. This decline in style and skill has led to a lowest-common-denominator commoditization of communication in cyberspace, which when exercised in person is often stunted at best.


Skip Weisman, a fellow member of The Leadership Trust recently posted an insightful article that brought the topic of Ineffective Workplace Communication to the fore. Much like the management-by-walking-around movement got us out of our offices and back onto the plant floors and into the work spaces of our teams, so too must we now look up from our smart phones and tablets, set them down, and engage our colleagues in an authentic, in-person manner to redevelop the skills that our forebears exercised well and effectively.

This communication breakdown is occurring on two levels: (1) our own behavior; and (2) the behavior of those we interact with.

I'm the worst offender...I had to come to terms with my own behavior. Now, while I hadn't exactly crossed over to the realm of believing that "my friends live in it," I had found myself walking down the street--even crossing the street--checking email, etc. I would sit in meetings and check incoming messages as they appeared, which is often every five minutes or less. As colleagues, friends and family would bring it to my attention, I'd laugh the observations off with a "hey, this is how we do it" smile and shoulder shrug.

Because I do speak publicly and meet with others so frequently, I wasn't experiencing the entropy of interpersonal communication, nor was I pulling out my smart phone in the midst of delivering seminars. But I certainly was allowing technological interconnectedness to come into conference rooms and restaurants beyond what I would characterize as good form. So, I took personal responsibility for it and decreased (not eliminated) my own personal offenses. Heck, if our nation's forebearers were able to found the United States, establish international trade treaties, and usher in the industrial revolution with free market civility--all without 24/7 texting and email-- then I became convinced that I'd survive without my face glued to my handheld device.

Regarding those with whom we interact, we can certainly gently remind them that eye contact is still in vogue, but truly once we take control of our own behavior, we can then restore enough sanity from our end to restore and strengthen traditional face-to-face dialogue. This is where it gets really interesting.

The more that I observe the degradation of communication in individuals who recede into the relative non-verbal safety of their tablets and smart phones, the more that I realize the crutch that these devices represent to those who may always have been uncomfortable communicating verbally. While I do not expect every individual to assume a gregarious posture contrary to a more sedate nature, I have come to recognize poor communication among managers and teams as contributing to productivity decreases, turnover and heightened stress in the workplace. Either provide communication training to those individuals, or simply stop promoting them beyond their communicative capability.

Let's look at our own teams:

• Should we be devoting more time to truly open team communication and one-on-one meetings?
• Have we asked and accurately understood our employees' individual passions, both professional and personal?
• Do we exercise the courage the solicit feedback from our leaders, peers and direct reports so that we may improve our communication and work style?

Like many of you, I enjoy the convenience and effectiveness that my communication technology provides, but sometimes we just have to put the darn devices down, walk around, pause, make eye contact and have an authentic conversation with the individuals around us.

Certainly, we have made some great strides during the technological revolution, but as Maya Angelou noted, we cannot cease devoting ourselves to "improving the quality of man's humanity to man."

Lead with Integrity.

ALLIGATORS IN EVERY SWAMP

“A man does what he must - in spite of personal consequences, in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures - and that is the basis of all human morality.” ~Winston Churchill

“Courage and perseverance have a magical talisman, before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into air.” ~John Quincy Adams

 

“If the fisherman and the hunters feared alligators, then there would be no recreation in the swamp.” Far from being an over broad generalization, the speaker was simply making the point that motivation overcomes perceived obstacles. While it is wise to mitigate risk—especially the risk of being overtaken by an alligator during a hunting trip—as Leaders we cannot wait until all obstacles have been removed before proceeding.

There are “alligators in every swamp.” The alligators are the obstacles and the swamp is the arena in which we are operating. While our ultimate objective might be to rid the swamp of all alligators (perhaps by “draining the swamp”), in the immediate term we must be able to effectively lead our teams, serve our clients and meet or exceed our organization’s objectives.

On a personal leadership level, one must be able to identify the potential or known alligator—perhaps a rival—and develop strategies to effectively collaborate with the individual when necessary (perhaps even daily) and to leave the alligator well enough alone the remainder of the time. Over time, trust may strengthen as the alligator comes to regard you as a non-predator, and a relationship may very well blossom.

At the team leadership level, we are well-served to anticipate the obstacles that may arise in resource allocation, miscommunication, diverse skill sets and personalities, etc. Upon taking inventory of each team member, whether via personality/behavioral testing or objective observation, develop individuals and assign roles to maximize the unique qualities that each member of the team possesses and executes well. As team membership changes, re-assess and re-assign as you deem effective.

When reviewing the swamp at the organizational level, we must begin with our mission. What outcomes have we committed to achieving to fulfill our mission? Much like the dedicated hunter that braves the presence of alligators to nonetheless enter the fertile swamp, we as Leaders must acknowledge with certainty and optimism that although we will encounter obstacles in our path to achieve the outcomes, we shall not fall to those obstacles.

Marketplace competitors, government regulation, loss of key executives, etc. always have been and will continue to be present as we pursue our mission. Our commitment to set and achieve identifiable and measurable personal, team and organizational outcomes must supersede any tendency toward hesitation or retrenchment. Acknowledging and neutralizing the alligators in our swamp quickly will enable us to lead our teams to focus solely upon those misson-driven outcomes.

Leave it to others less committed and less passionate (rivals, competitors, naysayers) to delay or to stay home and miss an abundant day of fishing in the swamp. Lead the way!

DON'T STEAL MY JOY!

"If a man love the labour of any trade apart from any question of success or fame, the gods have called him." ~Robert Louis Stevenson

 

"Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work." ~Aristotle 

Continuing the theme from my previous article, I had been thinking more about how we lead those members of our team who appear to have plateaued in their roles.

I am reminded of a time earlier in my career when I was meeting with one of my Accounting Specialists (we'll call her "Sherry"). Sensing that her abilities exceeded her present role, I had been encouraging Sherry for some time to learn new tasks, go back to school for additional education, and position herself for advancement in the Organization. I valued Sherry's contributions and loyalty to the Team. During this particular meeting, I was proposing assigning Sherry some new duties with greater responsibility, and I was suggesting that I delegate some of her current duties to another Accounting Specialist to alleviate some of Sherry's work load.

I'll never forget what came next. Sherry looked at me and said calmly but firmly, "Cris, don't steal my joy!"

A bit confused by her response, I clarified further, "Sherry, I am very pleased with your work on this Team, so I want to provide you with new opportunities." I continued sincerely but naively, "This is a good thing I'm suggesting."

"I would be happy to take on these additional tasks and the project, but please don't take away my current tasks," Sherry continued. "I enjoy doing them."

Aha! So that was the rub. In my zeal to develop my Team Member with advancement opportunities, I had neglected to fully understand how and why Sherry had come into the role I had found her in. Because I had viewed her outstanding work ethic, trustworthiness, and loyalty to me (as the Leader) and to her peers through my own lens, I had failed to inquire further into Sherry's own perception of her value to the Team and to the Organization.

Taken in that new light, but cognizant that Sherry would not be able to effectively shoulder all of the new duties with all of her existing duties, we negotiated to ensure that Sherry retained those prior duties she most valued and would remain the back-up on the additional duties that she agreed she would shed. As Leaders, we must shun the gut-level assumption that "resistance to change" or "secure comfort zones" are the only reasons member of our Team might wish to perform longstanding duties. As Sherry taught me that day, some employees simply--heavens!--ENJOY THEIR WORK.

Sherry had shown longtime loyalty to the Organization. She didn't want to set the world on fire, become the CEO, or lead a Division. But, like many members of the Teams we lead daily, Sherry wanted to contribute to the Team's success, further the objectives of the Organization, and have fun doing it. Really not so bad when you view the win-win outcome against the philosophical backdrop of the likes of Aristotle and Robert Louis Stevenson.

TODAY'S QUESTION: Are YOU fully informed about the individual reasons why your Team Members gravitate to and excel at the work that they perform? If not, when will YOU schedule that conversation?

BLOOMING WHERE YOU'RE PLANTED

“You’re not going to do this forever. There’s a finite amount of time you’re going to be doing this. Do this really, really well. And if you do this really, really well, everybody will see that, and they’ll move you onto the next thing. And you do that well, and then you’ll move." ~Gene Ross, as recalled by Terry Lundgren, CEO of Macy's

"Truly charity has no limit; for the love of God has been poured into our hearts by His Spirit dwelling in each one of us, calling us to a life of devotion and inviting us to bloom in the garden where He has planted and directing us to radiate the beauty and spread the fragrance of His Providence." ~St. Francis de Sales (1567-1622)

Hunger? Chutzpah? Impatience? Go-Getter?

How do you characterize that insistent quality--what I refer to as "career energy"--in the Leaders you train, coach and develop? How do/did the Leaders you report(ed) to characterize that quality in YOU?

I think back to my early energized career and how I couldn't understand my own Mother's serene satisfaction with her plateau in the professional world. Lost on me until many years later was that my Mother had found her niche in the workplace, and it balanced very nicely with her other life areas. Not until I had grown personally and professionally, stumbling repeatedly along the way over my own hubris, did I come to appreciate that each of us has the opportunity to "bloom where we're planted."

Many of us are familiar with a variation of the story of the three steelworkers atop the skeletal girders of a future skyscraper. A reporter happens upon the three men at the end of their shift and asks each of them what work they are performing. The first steelworker replies with exhaustion, "I do what I'm told, welding day after day." The second steelworker replies saracastically, "I'm constructing the frame of a building for do-nothing suits." The third steelworker pauses, wipes sweat from his brow, and looks skyward hopefully and smiles, "I'm a member of a crew dedicated to raising the finest office building this City's ever seen, in which our sons and daughters will one day earn their living upon graduation from college..."

Any one who has ever weathered a sanitation strike or a transit strike knows firsthand that there are no insignificant professions in our society. Even when participating in volunteer work, I find that I often don't encounter much competition for roles that involve cleaning restrooms or picking up trash--and so I readily request those jobs because I know that when they don't get accomplished with passion, the visual (and olfactory) results are embarassingly unpleasant. Dirt under my nails is good for my soul.

Reflect back to someone you met who may have been performing a menial task, but was doing it with gusto and enthusiasm. I love to tell about the young gentleman sweeping the street at DisneyWorld's Hollywood Studios who saw me and my wife reviewing our map, and walked right over to us and happily escorted us halfway across the park to the show venue we were seeking. We all must remember--as I did that afternoon--to find that individual's Leader and point out our satisfaction with his/her team member's committed action. Remember, a caring someone may have done exactly that (as Terry Lundgren remarks further in the link above) for YOU at the dawn of YOUR career.

TODAY'S QUESTIONS: Turning our attention to our own Team--to the Leaders and future Leaders, as well as to our plateaued Team Members--how are we receiving and perceiving that insistent characteristic or lack there of?

• Are we acknowledging and encouraging the individual's career energy?
• Are we harnessing and aligning that energy for the good of the organization?
• Are we coaching and focusing the individual to reduce potential negative consequences of misguided career energy?
• Are we designing succession plans that incorporate these individuals into appropriate roles and providing stretch goals to translate that raw energy into meaningful experience?
• Are we engaging the plateaued individuals at periodic intervals to assess whether they have career energy brewing?

LOYALTY AMIDST LETHARGY

“People who love only once in their lives are. . . shallow people. What they call their loyalty, and their fidelity, I call either the lethargy of custom or their lack of imagination.” ~Oscar Wilde

“Lack of loyalty is one of the major causes of failure in every walk of life” ~Napoleon Hill Fidelity to the Team and to the Leader is of the utmost importance, without which revenue, profits, geographical expansion and new product development join the downward death spiral behind morale, personal development and organizational pride. That being said, what is a team member to do when it becomes apparent that the Leader either is or has become ineffective? The client who brought the question to me found herself in the unpleasant situation at a large multinational corporation. Through our coaching, I learned that he had spent approximately 7 years at the organization, and had thrived under a prior Team Leader. When the Team acquired a new Leader, our client continued to employ the project management methodology that was used successfully throughout the corporation for product development and testing, only to learn gradually that the new Leader expressed little interest or enthusiasm for the methodology. Apparently the new Leader preferred a more dynamic, free-flowing development & testing process, which appeared to be more agile, but in fact created confusion and fostered lack of accountability within the Team. Attributing the new Leader's approach to her prior experience and training, our client committed himself to learning the Leader's project management preferences, work style and desired outcomes, but found himself repeatedly stifled and often removed from vital communication. The lethargy of this new Leader's lack of interest and lack of investment signaled a downward Team trend to our client.  Wishing to build upon his career and remain with the Organization, our client continued to remain loyal to the Leader, but began to lose confidence in that Leader due to her blind spots. The passage of time revealed that this Leader actually suffered from a professional weakness in the realm of project management, and promoted another individual who likewise dismissed the efficiency of the project management methodology. Three members departed the Team within a short period of time thereafter, though two remained within the Organization. I am a firm believer that one remains publicly loyal to the Leader, even when the Leader is misguided or underdeveloped in a particular area. Areas of disagreement are discussed personally, and professionally, behind closed doors. But each member of a Team is personally responsible to the continued success of the Organization at large, above being responsible to the Team and its Leader. Our client sought to remain loyal to the Leader, but understood that the Leader's failure to employ--and to actually diminish through her ignorance--the project management tools and methodology provided by the Organization amounted to pruning the healthy branches from the Organization's fruit tree. Eventually the tree would fail to bear additional fruit and decays. Thus, since our client's Leader and Assistant were both unconsciously working against the good of the Organization by ingraining their own personal comfort zones, we developed a professional plan whereby our client could remain loyal to the Leader; produce his own exceptional work product; apply the methodology in principle when called upon; and transition to a different Team upon which he could continue to contribute fruitfully to the good of the Organization. It then remained up to the ineffective Leader's Leader to identify measured increases in turnover, increases in error rates, and decreases in product development efficiency. Our client never had to speak ill of his Leader, allowing her professional ineffectiveness to be her own unmasking. TODAY'S QUESTION: How have you personally managed professional situations where an ineffective Leader stymied your own growth or your contributions to the Organization's objectives?