YOU Are Responsible

I made a decision this morning. And another decision. And another. Some of my decisions resulted in favorable results. Admittedly, some of my decisions were poorly made and resulted in embarassing, ugly, and unintended results.

So have YOU. What decisions have YOU made this morning? Last evening? A week ago? A year ago?

Each of those decisions YOU made were made consciously, of your own free will. For better or for worse.

• That book you read and enjoyed.
• That class you enrolled in and developed a new skill.
• That compliment you gave your child.
• That rude gesture you made to the driver who cut you off.
• That late arrival to work.

Yes, each of those decisions were made by YOU. And YOU will likely embrace the first three as being obvious good exercises of your decision-making prowess. Yet YOU may just as quickly provide an "explanation" of why the latter two actions occurred, certainly not of your own free will:

• "The jerk wasn't looking where he was going, and he could have hurt someone!"
• "The train was running late, because of the flooding from the rains."

We have been conditioned to accept the favorable results of our decisions (even if the decision was prompted by an external suggestion, question, or request). Likewise, we have been conditioned to justify the frankly embarassing results of our decisions (the italicized portion following the initial reason).

In the five examples above, let's elaborate a little more:

• I was lent the book by a friend who shares my taste in fiction. I made the decision to read it, because I believed that my friend's past recommendations have been accurate. Result: I enjoyed reading the story that I read.
• My boss instructed me to enroll in a software class to prepare me to implement the software across our division. I made the decision to enroll in the class, because I believed that her request was aligned with my role at work and would result in greater visibility to management. Result: I mastered the skill required to lead the software implementation.
• I love my child and although he continues to struggle to earn a C in Algebra, I know that he has been applying himself with his tutor which has elevated my son's grade from the D- he initially was earning. I made the decision to acknowledge my son's effort, because I believed that it is better to highlight his progress than to deride his lack of mastery. Result: I built trust and confidence with my son.
• I was frustrated by the driver cutting me off while I was talking on my cell phone. I made the decision to lash out toward that drive, because I believed that it could absolve me from my own embarassment at my personal distraction that contributed to my diminished awareness while driving in the presence of my passenger. Result: I built up frustration and disappointment in myself that continued to distract me while I drove on that road.
• I was late to work when I failed to leave the apartment earlier than usual, despite my prior experience with how heavy rains can affect the commuter train schedule. I made the decision to blame my late arrival on the training without acknowledging my failure to catch an earlier train, because I believed that my boss would accept my "Act of God" excuse and not question my own failure to be proactive in leaving home earlier. Result: I beat myself up inside for appearing irresponsible, especially once I realized that all of my similarly-situated commuting co-workers had managed to arrive at work on time.

Bottom line is that we decide (sometimes well-reasoned, sometimes defensively) because we believe that a certain outcome will result. When we decide with forethought in an authentic manner, generally our result will reflect our belief. It is when we pervert the decision-making process that we somehow think that our result will differ from our hidden, self-protecting belief. We know that the results in the latter case do not generally please us.

Today's Question:

What decisions will YOU make differently today?

LIFE: Fully Lived

"LIFE: Fully Lived"

...that's how I want it to read when my name is being checked in St. Peter's book. I certainly will not know the day nor the hour, but I am confident that when my time comes, there will be an opportunity to review the impact that my life (in deeds and in words) had upon my family, my friends, and my community at large.

Wouldn't it have been a shame to show up to meet our Creator face-to-face on that glorious day, only to then have to admit to Him that I only used 25, 50, or 75% of my life's purpose? Hence, I'm aspiring to have that entry read as above: Fully Lived.

I believe that many of the other entries on my page in the book will be of lesser importance. I don't anticipate that our Creator is going to praise a workaholic attitude toward work...a perfectly tidy home...an enviably manicured lawn...a large retirement account...

No, I have a much simpler outlook on how that glorious dialogue will pan out. I believe that our Creator will look at my wife, my daughter, my parents, my neighbors, my community, my city as the living embodiments of areas in my life that I left an indelible impact. People -- not property, titles, bank accounts, plaques. In the hearts of those individuals with whom I came into contact, did I leave them better than I found them or did I serve my own ego by taking something away from those relationships without nurturing and growing those relationships?

Today's Question:

When YOU arrive at the threshold of death and see YOUR name in the book, what entry will YOU find beside the category of LIFE?